You're Not What I Expected

How often have you said this? How often have you heard this? Sadly, there seems to be a "no filter" rule where people say what they are thinking. The good, the bad, and the ugly...it is all out there. But let's get back to the original line - what did you expect? More importantly, WHY did you expect that? There are assumptions based on where a person lives, the car they drive...and the worst - their personal appearance! Why do we assume a person's value system based solely on their outward appearance? It is just human nature...or is it our own judgement system? Regardless, it's time to change that!

We have all seen someone exit a vehicle similar to the one pictured and make a judgement about the driver based solely on the fact that they are driving a vehicle that needs work. Similarly, when we see someone roll up in a high end vehicle, we think they have excessive funds. The reality is a 'souped up' lower end vehicle can cost the same as a basic luxury end vehicle. But we don't think that, we make assumptions based on what we see, not what's underneath. There is an assumption on a person's character based on their outer appearance. Someone with colorful hair, multiple piercings and tattoos must be "X" and someone who is clean cut must be "Y". Take Pete Sampras and Andre Agassi - tennis in the 90's was great to watch when these two took the court. Sampras, as a clean cut all American boy and Agassi, with hair flowing beneath his tie-dyed headband created an illusion what was in fact, opposite of their true nature. Sampras was the "wild child" and Agassi was quiet and stayed under the radar.

What if someone were to make assumptions about you based on what they see? Would someone make an assumption about you that is not the image you wish to reflect? Are you presenting your "authentic" self? There is a difference between keeping your emotional battles beneath the surface and presenting an image that is insincere or not an accurate reflection of who you are.

By the same token, we should not make assumptions about any person based on their appearance. We need to take the time to get to know people and see who they really are before determining if the relationship is one to continue or not. It seems as though the past few years have divided us as a society-people are pigeonholed into a particular category as a result of religion, politics, location, gender, etc. It's time for us to stop ASSUMING and truly be kind to one another. Smile and not judge-there is only one who can judge us and I know I am certainly not Him.

to be continued.....